My husband and I follow these 6 Things Good Parents Do In Front Of Their Kids on a daily basis. Or at the very least, we are trying! Because the example we are setting at home for our children is laying the foundation for many many years to come.
Being a good parent sometimes has NOTHING to do with your children.
Sounds weird huh? But the way we interact with our own mothers, our friends, even strangers we come across impacts our children and helps them form ideas about how they too should treat others.
So, of course, the relationship we have with our spouse, coupled with how we treat him in front of our children, will have huge implications…in the way our children treat their father, in the way they perceive a healthy marriage and in the way they will one day treat their future husband or wife.
So this can’t be taken lightly.
And it’s not always easy.
But I try to do these 6 things because it’s important.
6 Things Good Parents Do In Front Of Their Kids
1. Disagree – I’m not talking about physical altercations or screaming at each other. But disagreeing with each other? That’s okay.
I’ll go so far as to say it’s even good…because it’s normal. We are both unique and have different viewpoints. Showing our children that we can bring our problems up and have rational arguments shows them it’s okay to disagree.
2. Show Affection – A quick kiss when he gets home. A hug as he’s heading out the door to work. It means something. Not only does it show your children what a loving marriage looks like, it also reassures them that their parents’ relationship is strong. Kids need to know this – it provides safety and comfort.
3. Praise Each Other – I’m the first one to rib my husband…about how his stories go into every.single.detail. About how he takes longer than me to get ready. About how he sleeps in waaaayyyy longer than any mom every would!
But when it comes down to it, I am Bryan’s biggest fan.
I am constantly in awe of how smart he is. How I can give him any house project and he can figure out a way to make it happen (himself!). What a wonderful dad he is and how patient he can be…even when mine is long gone.
And I make sure our girls hear me talk about all his wonderful qualities…to him and even when he is not around.
4. Present A United Front – A tough one sometimes, I know…because you are different people (see #1).
But when it comes to raising your children, rewards, punishments, rules your family will follow – you absolutely have to present a united front. Because as sweet as those little bundles of joy are, once they sense any sort of divide between you, they will play that card for everything they can!
5. Forgive Each Other – We all make mistakes. We all do stupid things. We all say stupid stuff.
WE ALL DO! You….Me…Your Spouse…And your kids…
So if you children see that their parents can make mistakes but they forgive each other and still love them….guess what? That lets your children know they too are safe to make mistakes. And we will STILL love them.
6. Say Thank You – It is honestly the most basic and simple way we can show our love for someone. To tell them thank you. To validate them. To let them know that way they did was important to us.
Your spouse needs to hear this…whether it’s for taking out the trash or for playing in the snow with your kids (because you hate the cold). Anything counts. Everything is worth appreciating.
And every time your children hear you saying thank you, it reminds them to do the same.
Because what they say is true…our children are sponges. And they are watching you…and your spouse…and the way you two treat each other is exactly what they will think is the standard.
Let’s make sure we set a high one.
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