As part of my 31 Days and 31 Ways to Be a Better Mom series, I wanted to share Our Before School Rule. Because if your house is anything like mine, that one or two crucial hours before the tardy bell rings have the potential to be the worst part of your day!
I’m so excited you’re back today to join me on this journey over the next 31 days! If you’re a new visitor, be sure and check out this post to see what the whole 31 Days and 31 Ways to be a Better Mom series is all about. And keep checking back in every day so you don’t miss anything! Each post will be on my Facebook page and in my newsletter as well.
Having children brings a whole new perspective to being on time for anything I’ve found. Whether it’s your baby that needs to nurse the MOMENT you are ready to step out the door, your potty-training toddler that has to go #2 as you’re ready to leave for the doctor’s appointment, or your 6 year old dragging their feet on a school morning. Sometimes it seems you have no control!
Over the years, I have certainly come up with a lot of tips and tricks to help you get out the door during the school year but even I know that many days, some things are just out of your control!
But what I have also learned (and remind myself of daily) is that what is most important in those 2-3 hours before school is NOT that my kids are dressed appropriately with teeth brushed and hair combed. It is NOT that I fed them a nutritionally sound breakfast. It is NOT even that they arrived to school on time.
What’s My Rule (For ME!) On School Mornings?
Sure, those things are realllllyy important, don’t get me wrong. But what is most important each morning is that I send my kids off to school with good memories of our morning. That they remember home as their safe haven and me as their best friend. NOT that I fussed at Hannah this morning because she drug her feet getting out of bed and then spilled her bowl of cereal. Not that my girls got into an argument and I yelled at them for not working things out.
Because when my girls get to school, they are away from me for a full 6 hours. And I don’t know what they will face when they are out of my loving arms. Will there be bullies? The fear of fitting in? No one to sit with at lunch? Subjects they just can’t grasp?
Or maybe I do know what they will face at school – Bullies, the fear of fitting in, no one to sit with at lunch and school subjects they just don’t get.
So knowing that, how can I send them to school stressed out and anxious from MY behavior?
So the one rule I try to keep in our house is that regardless of the circumstances, I will bite my tongue and refrain from fussing at or reprimanding my girls over anything that is not life or death.
Is this a hard rule to keep? Yes! Especially when little irritating things start to add up in the mornings and I just CANNOT for the life of me understand why my girls can’t seem to find two matching shoes as we are headed out the door.
Do I keep this rule perfectly every day? No…because I’m human. But is it worth the extra effort to try and make it happen most days? Absolutely.
And don’t think I give my girls a free pass on behavior, attitudes or actions that don’t fly in our home. I usually say a simple “We can talk about it this afternoon,” and then I address it that same day.
Time & Distance Make Little Things A LOT Less Important
But you know what? Once 6 hours have passed and we’re not on a timeline and we’ve all had a little distance, it’s a lot easier to discuss those silly things. And it’s also a lot easier to come up with a viable plan of action to fix those problems.
And perhaps most importantly, that time and distance remind me that whatever it was I was all stressed and irritated about that morning, isn’t really a big deal.
And that this time in my life will pass all too quickly. That the days of them wanting me to lay with them when they wake up will all too soon be replaced with teenage hormones and a biological need to pull away from me.
What Will Your Kids Really Remember?
And I realize that, 10 years from now, my girls probably won’t remember how they drove me batty because I was unable to keep their leggings from touching their socks (true story). But they will remember that each time they went to school, they had a feeling of peace and calm and that they knew, no matter how bad the day may go, the morning was good and that I would be home waiting for them.
I would love to hear what you do in the mornings to make things go smoother for you and your family!
And be sure to come back tomorrow for Day 2! Can’t wait to see you then!
If you have missed any in the series 31 Days & 31 Ways To Be A Better Mom, catch up here:
INTRO TO SERIES:
DAY 1: OUR BEFORE SCHOOL RULE
DAY 2: UNPLUG AND PLUG IN
DAY 3: STEP AWAY FROM YOUR CHILD
DAY 4: EMBRACE YOUR CRAZY
DAY 5: BE A REBEL
DAY 6: DO AS I SAY
DAY 7: FIND YOUR VILLAGE
DAY 8: DIVIDE & CONQUER
DAY 9: ONE SMART COOKIE
DAY 11: STOP COMPARING YOUR CHILD
DAY 12: TAKE CARE OF #1
DAY 13: DATE YOUR CHILD
DAY 17: PUT YOURSELF IN THEIR SHOES
DAY 18: QUIT BEATING YOURSELF UP
DAY 22: FAMILY DINNER SHMINNER
DAY 23: REBELLION IS A CRAZY THING
DAY 24: TELL THEM IT WILL GET BETTER
DAY 26: IT’S OKAY TO WISH TODAY WAS OVER
DAY 27: BE A GOOD DAUGHTER
DAY 28: QUIT TRYING TO BE THAT OTHER MOM
DAY 29: YOU CAN’T BUY THEIR HAPPINESS
DAY 30: TELL YOUR KIDS YOU ARE A FAILURE
DAY 31: LEARNING TO LET GO