Unplug to plug in … it sounds so simple, doesn’t it? Why is it so hard?
How Does Your Day Begin?
Beep, beep beep…It’s 5:30 am….I hit the snooze button on my iPhone. 15 minutes later, I turn the alarm off and roll out of bed. Creep down the stairs ever so quietly. Start my coffee. Plop on the couch. Check the weather on my phone. Check my emails on my computer. Don’t forget Facebook! Log into my newspaper account to check local and national headlines.
Text a few friends I know keep early hours like me. Work on this blog.
Do you see where I’m going? Even BEFORE my children wake, my entire morning has revolved around my electronic devices. Is it really reasonable to think that once my girls stumble out of bed with their messy hair and half-open eyes that I will miraculously shut everything down and focus only on them?
Unplug From The Virtual World and Plug In to The Real One
Not likely…at least not without a plan. So today I am proposing a relatively easy plan to help you unplug from the virtual world and plug in to the real one. To plug in to your children and their needs, if only exclusively for a short period of a time.
I mean, I get it. This isn’t the world we grew up in. When I was little, the only thing competing for my mom’s attention (outside of my two other sisters) was the phone!! Yeah sure, we had tv but my mom, who btw is the best mom in the entire world in my eyes, never watched tv until we went to bed.
And that phone?? Well, she was rarely on it. Because we were her entertainment, so to speak. She signed up for this motherhood thing and we were hers. No distractions.
But these days, I personally feel naked if I accidentally leave home without my phone. What if I’m in an accident? What if the doctor calls me back? What if the girls are sick at school? You see, our connected world has a lot of benefits too.
It just so happens that distracted mothering isn’t one of them.
So what’s my solution? Don’t stress – I’m not telling you to go cold-turkey because honestly in this day and age, one would be hard pressed to manage without a cell phone and computer (though I’m sure some people do).
No, I’m merely suggesting that for 1 hour a day, you walk away from everything but being in the moment with your kids.
I find the best way for me to do this is to actually leave my phone, computer, iPad, etc, somewhere else in the house. So if the girls and I are in the playroom upstairs, I leave my phone in the kitchen downstairs.
Sometimes we play, sometimes we read. But more often than not, this is when my kids, especially my older daughter, open up. Talk about their day. Tell me the things that happened at school, who she played with, how her test went. The little things….but really the big things when you think about it.
Because it’s nice to be listened to…and to be heard. Ask yourself how you feel when you’re talking to your friend and her nose is always buried in her phone. Sure, you get the occasional uh-huh and head nod but it certainly doesn’t make you feel very special, does it? Now imagine you’re the child here. And the one person you love the most doesn’t seem to have time to JUST PUT DOWN HER PHONE and be with you.
Let’s do It Together
So today, I hope you’ll take on this challenge and know I’ll be doing it with you. And hopefully lots of other parents reading this blog will do the same. And we will know that the world won’t stop spinning without our phones in that hour.
But in that one hour, the world will melt away for our kids because it will be just us and them. And they will feel heard.
See you tomorrow as we continue along this month’s journey of 31 Days and 31 Ways to Be a Better Mom!
If you have missed any in the series 31 Days & 31 Ways To Be A Better Mom, catch up here:
INTRO TO SERIES:
INTRO TO 31 DAYS & 31 WAYS TO BE A BETTER MOM
DAY 1: OUR BEFORE SCHOOL RULE
DAY 2: UNPLUG AND PLUG IN
DAY 3: STEP AWAY FROM YOUR CHILD
DAY 4: EMBRACE YOUR CRAZY
DAY 5: BE A REBEL
DAY 6: DO AS I SAY
DAY 7: FIND YOUR VILLAGE
DAY 8: DIVIDE & CONQUER
DAY 9: ONE SMART COOKIE
DAY 10: CREATE YOUR OWN FAMILY TRADITIONS
DAY 11: STOP COMPARING YOUR CHILD
DAY 12: TAKE CARE OF #1
DAY 13: DATE YOUR CHILD
DAY 14: THE MEAL TIME RULE WE DON’T BREAK
DAY15: GIVE THEM KISSES LOTS OF KISSES
DAY 16: IN THE MIDST OF THE STORM, BE THEIR CALM
DAY 17: PUT YOURSELF IN THEIR SHOES
DAY 18: QUIT BEATING YOURSELF UP
DAY 19: RELAX…YOU ARE NEVER GOING TO FINISH
DAY 20: NURTURING YOUR MARRIAGE AFTER CHILDREN
DAY 21: WHEN THEY ARE HARD TO LOVE, LOVE THEM HARDER
DAY 22: FAMILY DINNER SHMINNER
DAY 23: REBELLION IS A CRAZY THING
DAY 24: TELL THEM IT WILL GET BETTER
DAY 25: YOU DON’T HAVE TO LOVE YOUR KIDS THE SAME
DAY 26: IT’S OKAY TO WISH TODAY WAS OVER
DAY 27: BE A GOOD DAUGHTER
DAY 28: QUIT TRYING TO BE THAT OTHER MOM
DAY 29: YOU CAN’T BUY THEIR HAPPINESS
DAY 30: TELL YOUR KIDS YOU ARE A FAILURE
DAY 31: LEARNING TO LET GO
BE SURE AND CHECK OUT THESE OTHER POSTS!
You hit the nail on the head about the iPhone. The other day, after I got to work, I realized I forgot my phone. Talk about feeling naked. Ugh. But later, when I finally met up w/my phone again, I won’t tell you how many “why aren’t you answering” messages were left!
I know it’s crazy to think we used to not have cell phones! Now we feel like we are in constant danger if we forgot them lol!
Best. Advice. Ever. I can’t wait to see how you’ll top this for the rest of the month! I’ll admit, it was easier before I started blogging to walk away from everything. I don’t always have a full hour – but I, too, leave my devices in a different room to make sure they get time with me and all of my attention 🙂
Yes Karen, the blogging does make it a lot more difficult. But I tell myself it’s such a small fraction of the day, everything can wait.
This is such great advice. I laughed out loud at your morning part because that’s exactly how my days start. Such a bad habit. I’ve been trying really hard to set my phone in the other room and just focus on my kids between snack and when I have to make dinner in the afternoons. It’s hard though some days! Technology is addictive.
It’s crazy how hard it is when just a decade ago it would have been no big deal.
Thankyou so much.
<3