As moms we get so wrapped up in crossing things off our To-Do list that we often forget this: Day 19 Relax – You Are Never Going To Finish. I mean, like NEVER! And it’s good and it’s bad and it’s all in a day of parenting. But the sooner we accept this truism, the sooner we can focus on what’s really important.
The Race Begins
Alarm off – jump out of bed – rouse snoring hubby – run downstairs to take dog out – drink obligatory 2 cups of coffee before waking girls – get said girls ready for school – arrive in car line on 2 wheels because you should have jumped faster out of bed – rush to work out – shower – stop at grocery store for a few items – take dog out – grab youngest from preschool – semi-healthy lunch – check emails – play babies – vacuum and pick up what seems to be the exact same items you picked up yesterday – pick up older child from school – gymnastics – home – dinner – bath – bed…
ARE YOU READY FOR IT??????????
Let that sink in for just a moment…now, do you see what I mean? For all the gazillion items I may or may not have checked off today, the majority of them I’ll do again tomorrow or the next day or next week. And in the meanwhile, I will have added about 10 more.
And this isn’t meant to be discouraging.
This is life..not just being a mom. Think about being in school – attend class, study, take tests, write paper, repeat. Same as at work.
Life is pretty routine..and we really should thank our lucky stars for that. For all the daydreaming we may have about new adventures each day, our bodies would probably combust if our minds had to process all that newness each day.
But the problem becomes when, as moms, we become so focused on “finishing” something that we forget to be in the moment and really enjoy life with our children.
So I can sign up to bring in cupcakes for the PTO Fall festival. Stress about making them, stress about getting them there, stress if they will be eaten. And the whole time I missed a chance to bake with my girls, smear icing on their noses, and sneak one for each of us before drop-off.
All because I could only see the finish line.
Which, let me tell you my friend, is never really in sight. You may think you’re getting close, but as you do, it inches slowly further away. One item checked off, another one added.
But I’m not jaded…actually, it’s quite the opposite. For me, it’s a reminder that all of these deadlines I feel looming are mostly self-imposed. Who cares if today I didn’t vacuum the house or unpack the dishwasher…or if I started that load of clothes one more time?!
What if I didn’t get dinner with friends scheduled and we were a few minutes tardy for school?
There’s always tomorrow – another day, another chance…to finish. To do it better.
And you know what – I can’t be thankful enough. Because I will take this tomorrow and the one after that and the one after that.
Because while I’m repeating the same ol’ same ol’, I am also getting to wake my kids each morning, kiss their smushy faces, wash their precious clothes, love them, care for them and try my best to be a good example. I’m getting to be their mom and my husband’s wife. We are getting to be a family and be together. We get to agree, argue, kiss and make up all in a day’s time. We are getting to see that what really matters in this life is each other and the way we treat others. We are getting to trod this path together, hand in hand.
So I’ll take my to-do list and wad it up (well, not too crumpled because I’ll probably need to dig that out tomorrow). But I WILL stop focusing on “getting” it done but instead on what I’m “getting” to do each day.
And thank God I’ll never get it done.
If you have missed any in the series 31 Days & 31 Ways To Be A Better Mom, catch up here:
INTRO TO SERIES:
DAY 1: OUR BEFORE SCHOOL RULE
DAY 2: UNPLUG AND PLUG IN
DAY 3: STEP AWAY FROM YOUR CHILD
DAY 4: EMBRACE YOUR CRAZY
DAY 5: BE A REBEL
DAY 6: DO AS I SAY
DAY 7: FIND YOUR VILLAGE
DAY 8: DIVIDE & CONQUER
DAY 9: ONE SMART COOKIE
DAY 11: STOP COMPARING YOUR CHILD
DAY 12: TAKE CARE OF #1
DAY 13: DATE YOUR CHILD
DAY 17: PUT YOURSELF IN THEIR SHOES
DAY 18: QUIT BEATING YOURSELF UP
DAY 22: FAMILY DINNER SHMINNER
DAY 23: REBELLION IS A CRAZY THING
DAY 24: TELL THEM IT WILL GET BETTER
DAY 26: IT’S OKAY TO WISH TODAY WAS OVER
DAY 27: BE A GOOD DAUGHTER
DAY 28: QUIT TRYING TO BE THAT OTHER MOM
DAY 29: YOU CAN’T BUY THEIR HAPPINESS
DAY 30: TELL YOUR KIDS YOU ARE A FAILURE
DAY 31: LEARNING TO LET GO